Fevers

Colby had a fever after his surgery and it wouldn't go away. Finally Sunday they gave him motrin and it left. So we came home. Sunday night it was back again. I took him to the pediatrician yesterday to see if they would run the blood tests that the nuerosurgery residents wouldn't run. Poor kid had to have a catheter to get a urine sample and there was no urine to collect. So we bagged him and came home hoping we could get the results before today. They came back clean so the doctor ordered a whole set of blood work to be done. So back to the lab we went, just before they closed. I figured some of them need 48 hours to grow a culture so it was stupid to waste 12 hours last night. Haven't heard any results yet but if none of the cultures grow then it will be a spinal tap next to rule out meningitis. I would love it if my boy could catch a break.

Not really sure why but I'm having a hard time with all of this. I guess I just wish he could talk and tell me if he's hurting or sad or upset or what ever. I miss his voice on days like today. In his blessing before the surgery it said that there are people who need to meet Colby and that he will bring light to their lives. I know it's true but on days like today I wonder where the light is in his own life. It seems so dark to me sometimes that I hope he can look back on his life and see it as being happy and not as hard as I see it.

On a brighter note, it seems Riley thinks that life is a dance. She keeps saying "Come on guys, shake your body!" And then she shakes her little bum. As I type this her and Jahnna are outside jumping on the trampoline and getting along for the moment. I hope that her and Jahnna can be as good of friends as Colby and Jahnna were when he was this age. Jahnna keeps saying that she misses the old Colby and I hope that while Riley can never take his place she can be the friend that Jahnna needs.